Develop The Back Up Plan

I want you to think back to three years ago.  Three glorious years ago.  The economy was not in shambles.  The president was dumber than he is now.  We knew not of wise latinas.  And we still had years of using the fun "year" glasses on December 31. 

What else didn't you know?  The following terms: ex ante, mens rea, res ipsa loquiter, prima facie, consideration, etc.  No, I know that you knew "et cetera" before law school - I just meant . . . oh, never mind. 

But you were also full of hope and aspiration.  Jobs in biglaw were aplenty.  You might even have worked for a few years and thought of this as a decent investment - $150k over three years for a $160k per year salary instead of your measly $9 per hour and insignificant album sales.  For many of us, law was the backup plan. 

Well, those were the days, huh?  Clearly it's time for a new backup plan.  Medical school won't do - the BarBri lecturers keep telling me I'm bad at math - imagine how bad I actually am at science.  Business school?  That would buy (literally) a year or two, but probably won't actually make anything better.

No, we need to be more creative.

Spend class today looking for applications for jobs you are capable of doing and that might actually provide some career advancement.  How about these?

Waste Disposal Engineer

Investment Solicitor General

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Creative Food Combination Expert

Something In The Movie Industry

Electrical Engineer

Make Toilet Paper

 

 These are all viable options.  If you have other ideas, share them in the comments.