Brainstorm Rules to Make Up on the Bar

Memorizing rules is tough. In fact, I am pretty sure it is impossible, and yet, Barbri keeps explaining that "you will get points for stating the rule." Thank you for that amazing bit of knowledge. If I know every single wills rule and when to apply, I will probably do well. A monkey could tell me that.

I do remember some good information the Barbri peeps gave out at some point. One of them said that if you aren't sure what the rule is, make it up; you may get points for applying your incorrect rule correctly. I like the sound of that. If I can't apply my own ruled correctly, well, I should have made up a better rule.

I think it is important to start thinking about these fake rules now, so you don't freeze up when you look at that first essay question, spot 87 issues and 132 possible issues, and have no idea whether the plaintiff performed a valid nail and mail.

Now, making up the actual rules now is probably not the best option. Because then you will have to memorize your rules. This will probably be easier than memorizing the tortured doctrines lawyers refer to law, but still not ideal. What you need are some general guidelines for coming up with good rules. Here are some suggestions:

1. Make your rules easy to apply. A 20-factor "rule" is not the way to go. Channel Scalia (dissenting Scalia, trying to make sure federal courts don't get deluged with all those stupid 1983 claims) and draw bright lines. Something like: In NY, if someone is killed, the person who stands to gain the highest pecuniary benefit from the victim's death is guilty of murder. See, easy to apply, especially when you combine it with your wills rule: the spouse gets everything. Combine the two, and make the wife guilty.

2. Make the rules short. You have a limited amount of time to write your bar answers. Don't waste them on long rules. You are making them up, keep them short.

3. Memorize a couple Latin phrases. Not legal ones, ones that the exam scorers will not know. Every good rule has some Latin. Here are two: ab asino lanam (it is impossible to get wool from an ass (even if it's really hairy?) or blood from a stone), meum cerebrum nocet (my brain hurts).

4. Remember where you are taking the bar. This is especially important if you are taking it in two different states. Don't say "in NY" on the Florida bar. It will make your made-up rule seem stupid.

Feel free to post other suggests in the comments.